Almost one year down the road, it hits me again. Right smack in the middle of my face.
How does one let go? I realized I haven't. I get uneasy if I imagine him with someone else, but the thing is, I want him to be with someone else. I just am so confused. I do not want a relationship with the same person, but I miss not having it. I keep forgetting all the pain, and all I remember are the good times, and that makes it even more difficult.
I am clear and certain I did the right thing. I know I made the right decision. I also know for certain and I have no doubts that Swami will send someone soon. But I don't understand why there are times I feel like I haven't let go. At other times, I don't even think about it, and I feel like I have moved on.
HMmmm.. The laments of a broken heart eh... No not actually. I guess, it all started again after Thaipusam, cause we used to meet up during the day back in Ipoh, and being there at the same time, and not doing it this year felt weird, and it has been in my subconscious ever since.
It is also probably all these stress, work (yeah im working now :( ), all the exams, assignments, presentations, uni politics.. whoa.. a little too much to endure.. And so at times of high stress like this, you tend to regress, and you remember comforting times of the past, and so I thought of u.
Its ok.. I will get over it, I will move on as we all do. It is taking sometime because I probably still have lessons to learn from this.. :))
On a bright note, life is all good.. I havent blogged in ages because I have absolutely no time. Whatever free times are spent either with the girls, or Sai work, or uni....
Sister's engagement is coming, yay :) and Im getting my slr soon after, :)
How does one let go? I realized I haven't. I get uneasy if I imagine him with someone else, but the thing is, I want him to be with someone else. I just am so confused. I do not want a relationship with the same person, but I miss not having it. I keep forgetting all the pain, and all I remember are the good times, and that makes it even more difficult.
I am clear and certain I did the right thing. I know I made the right decision. I also know for certain and I have no doubts that Swami will send someone soon. But I don't understand why there are times I feel like I haven't let go. At other times, I don't even think about it, and I feel like I have moved on.
HMmmm.. The laments of a broken heart eh... No not actually. I guess, it all started again after Thaipusam, cause we used to meet up during the day back in Ipoh, and being there at the same time, and not doing it this year felt weird, and it has been in my subconscious ever since.
It is also probably all these stress, work (yeah im working now :( ), all the exams, assignments, presentations, uni politics.. whoa.. a little too much to endure.. And so at times of high stress like this, you tend to regress, and you remember comforting times of the past, and so I thought of u.
Its ok.. I will get over it, I will move on as we all do. It is taking sometime because I probably still have lessons to learn from this.. :))
On a bright note, life is all good.. I havent blogged in ages because I have absolutely no time. Whatever free times are spent either with the girls, or Sai work, or uni....
Sister's engagement is coming, yay :) and Im getting my slr soon after, :)
|
sweets, its ok to feel this way. and i think you've got the answer already :)
just remember, whatever the issue..im here, and so is the entire jin bang of anne's that love us to bits, despite bullying us silly.
and we learn more and more each day from every experience that we go through..
you're spot on ..Swami will send someone, at the right time, with all the right reasons :)
love u sayang!
hugs.