i realised most my blogs r of complain.. im sucha whiny pot.. i so wanna change but hmm
i dunno. i dun think i am.. ppl who dun really knoe me, prob assume im all stck up.. strong?? mayb coz i dun realy tell my personal stuffs to anyone except to those im really close to.. n even if im down or sad, i wud just put up another mask n act like nothing is wrong.. n even now.. everything is wrong.. am at the lowest point.. but i gotta put up a happy face n act lk nothing wrong.. al i wan is a glimpse of hope to tell me, i can n i must carry on no matter wat happens..n all i c is dat im totally way of coz.. n instead of rays of light i get lightings n thunderbolts.. but hey i love'em.. is dat a sign things wud be happy for me again?? i wonder.. n i shall not live in doubts.. happy times r cumin... yeah yeah...
sighs.. negativeness take da better control of me.. where r u niway... do u even exist or do i have to make do wid anyone dat cums along..?? i scan the multiple acne-scarred face... findin for the tweak of light... or possible the wordings on ur forehead sayin..'hey, look no more.. its me" but nay... 21 years.. unsuccessfull... mayb better luck nex year.. or i shud move.. move uni.. move country... try diff things.. keep u off my mind a while n poof u wud appear.. but i sure hope u wud have it printed on ur head or elsewhere** winks.. it wud be difficult to trust a bare stranger afta gropin my way in a dark spindly tunnel wudnt it...
life oh life.. u r a wonder.. u make me wonder ... but wifout sadness, we wun get happiness , wud we? no.. thus,, let me brace myself, n push myself harder.. to reach points i haven;t ventured into.. to go where i havent dreamt off b4,, to smile n look and breathe in the wonder of the warm sun n misty drizzles..